Three months: Wonder and Logistics

Sometimes no matter how much you want to get done, you still don't want to put your baby down. And no matter how much you delight in each new skill, expression, discovery or milestone, you can't get over how quickly he'll outgrow being able to sleep on your chest. It has been one of those days. For the first time this morning, little E slept in his crib for a nap unaided by the familiar bassinet (that I'd placed inside the crib a few days ago for nap practice). And I as watched my growing boy sleep, I celebrated . . . and grieved a little bit too. Chesney's song "Don't Blink" ran through my head. How do I avoid blinking?

It's especially hard to avoid blinking when you are constantly thinking ahead, planning, re-working plans and trying to flex with the ever-changing seasons of your baby's life. This morning as soon as E was sleeping I had to make several decisions: Will I bake my healthy sunbutter cookies? Try to make brownies now for the neighbors? How much time do I have to send a few quick photo texts of E sleeping in the crib? Should I text the rest of my family too? Stop there - reality check. I have to leave the house by 9:15 to make it in time for a group walk with other Mamas - that means E needs to wake up and eat by 8:30 or 8:40 at the latest. So, as it is already 7:55, I need to get my priorities straight: get dressed, eat, finish cleaning the bottles from the pump set (so they have plenty of time to dry) and make sure the diaper bag is stocked. Mission mostly accomplished and oatmeal partway eaten when E started stirring and crying. Then I remembered I needed more wipe spray for my cloth wipes, having completely emptied the bottle this morning. So I ran and grabbed the distilled water and lavender oil and filled the spray bottle, then happily went to pick up my little boy. With him in my arms, I scarfed down several more bites of oatmeal. At 8:39, I sat down to nurse him. Between 9:11 and 9:21 I changed a diaper, ran to the bathroom, gave him a probiotic, fastened him into his car seat, took the wet cloth diapers out of the washer, put diaper bag in the car and finally grabbed the baby and drove off. We made it by 9:35, not the last Mama to arrive for the walk!

We're home again about 11:45 after stopping for gas. E didn't start crying in the car till after the gas station, for which I was grateful. 5 minutes of crying in the car is nothing like 40. Once at home there are a few quick essentials for me: run to the bathroom, drink water, take off shoes. Then he is happily nursing again. And I'm reading Stott's commentary on Romans and trying not to fall asleep - not an easy task after a 3 mile walk pushing the stroller and being up at 6 am! The much needed nap doesn't happen till 2 hours later. By then, I've eaten lunch, put the cloth diaper inserts in the dryer, made brownies and baked my cookies - not to mention playing with E on the mat and making sure he does tummy time. It has taken two bouncing sessions to help E go down for a nap in his crib. I should have about 30 minutes for sure, maybe more. But after 15 minutes, I'm awakened by a screaming baby - perhaps not at ease yet in his crib. He doesn't go back to sleep with bouncing, but falls easily back to sleep while nursing. He stays in a deep and happy sleep on my lap while I type with the computer propped up on my knees. So, that's where he wanted to nap. Close to my heart, just where I like him.